The game that we played

(9:06:15 PM) Brennan: would you rather eat a cocksickle or a poopsickle?
(9:06:25 PM) Brennan: (like an ice cube with a nougatey center)
(9:06:33 PM) Markus: oh god
(9:06:57 PM) Markus: I'd rather not have a popsicle ever again than have either of those
(9:07:17 PM) Brennan: not a choice, you can only pick from the selection given
(9:07:39 PM) Markus: I'm stating preference, and declining to answer
(9:07:43 PM) Brennan: No loopholes. Air enclosed box.
(9:07:59 PM) Markus: which means I suffocate one way or the other
(9:08:09 PM) Markus: if I'm dead, no choice must be made
(9:08:30 PM) Brennan: well one choice must've to result in the daisy-pushing
(9:08:35 PM) Markus: no
(9:08:41 PM) Markus: "air inclosed box"
(9:08:52 PM) Markus: I asphyxiated while considering my answer
(9:08:57 PM) Brennan: well, there are a few plants in there to help you out
(9:09:03 PM) Brennan: you never asked
(9:09:03 PM) Markus: HA!
(9:09:08 PM) Markus: HAHAHAHAHA
(9:09:09 PM) Brennan: I never said
(9:09:10 PM) Markus: LOL
(9:09:23 PM) Brennan: so choose you must
(9:10:14 PM) Markus: a few plants wou;dn
(9:10:18 PM) Markus: *wouldn't do it
(9:10:31 PM) Markus: there must be an ocean with algea in this box
(9:10:35 PM) Markus: or at least
(9:10:43 PM) Markus: a moderately sized pool
(9:10:47 PM) Markus: is there a pool?
(9:10:52 PM) Brennan: yes
(9:11:02 PM) Brennan: but out of reach of the participant
(9:11:13 PM) Markus: DAMN
(9:11:20 PM) Markus: You knew I was gonna drown
(9:11:38 PM) Brennan: until I press this button this invisible curtain will guard you from jumping in
(9:11:54 PM) Markus: ok, I've got it, I used my belt to hang myself
(9:12:06 PM) Brennan: there's no clothes in this box
(9:12:06 PM) Markus: And I definitely have a belt
(9:12:10 PM) Brennan: they disappear upon entering
(9:12:12 PM) Markus: I always have a belt
(9:12:19 PM) Markus: no, I would never walk in that box
(9:12:22 PM) Brennan: which begs the question of who is this perverted box-keeper
(9:12:47 PM) Brennan: which needn't be answered at this juncture
(9:12:50 PM) Markus: no clothes, no go in box, no choice must be made
(9:13:07 PM) Markus: clothes->in box->death->no answer
(9:13:08 PM) Brennan: this box was a trap that you walked into accidentally, without your knowing
(9:13:14 PM) Markus: oh
(9:13:33 PM) Markus: hrm
(9:13:33 PM) Markus: well then, I'm naked in a box?
(9:13:45 PM) Brennan: apparently
(9:13:49 PM) Markus: stab myself with one of the plants you said were nearby
(9:13:54 PM) Markus: death again
(9:14:03 PM) Brennan: again, invisible curtain.
(9:14:04 PM) Markus: also
(9:14:41 PM) Markus: the invisible curtain is unbreakable, or impenetrable, or otherwise solid and will not allow me to break through?
(9:14:59 PM) Brennan: did I mention the box was really tall so the curtain also goes up high and then there's ventilation slits between your portion of the room and the plant's (up high)
(9:15:11 PM) Brennan: and this curtain is unbreakable. but I can move it with this button.
(9:15:18 PM) Markus: nice curtain
(9:15:20 PM) Markus: as a sidenote
(9:15:23 PM) Markus: ok then
(9:15:32 PM) Markus: then I bludgeon myself against it until it kills me
(9:15:50 PM) Markus: you said it was definitely solid while it existed
(9:16:02 PM) Markus: *was in place
(9:16:12 PM) Markus: *I'm assuming it always "exists"
(9:16:28 PM) Brennan: surprisingly cushy to human touch
(9:16:42 PM) Markus: completely solid, you said so
(9:16:56 PM) Markus: completely solid implies hard
(9:16:59 PM) Brennan: solid doesn't imply non-cushiness
(9:17:09 PM) Brennan: structurally sound
(9:17:11 PM) Brennan: how's that
(9:17:50 PM) Markus: ok
(9:17:56 PM) Markus: I'll grant you that
(9:17:58 PM) Markus: for now
(9:18:01 PM) Markus: so then
(9:18:10 PM) Markus: how do I eat in this box?
(9:18:14 PM) Markus: I mean
(9:18:25 PM) Markus: it may take me a while to come to this decision
(9:19:09 PM) Markus: also, aside: you started all of this with your "airtight box" thing, you realize this yes?
(9:20:07 PM) Brennan: I told my housemates that I was having the most interesting conversation.
(9:20:20 PM) Markus: indeed?
(9:20:22 PM) Markus: very nice
(9:20:28 PM) Markus: so
(9:20:35 PM) Markus: how do I eat in the box?
(9:21:13 PM) Markus: press the button and push food through the gap in the wall perhaps?
(9:21:25 PM) Brennan: matter can be served by traveling from the opposite side of the wall and onto your side.
(9:21:50 PM) Brennan: but yes, again the button is pressed.
(9:21:50 PM) Markus: but the wall must be opened somehow
(9:21:52 PM) Markus: ok
(9:22:00 PM) Markus: plate of food?
(9:22:01 PM) Markus: bowl?
(9:22:06 PM) Markus: platter?
(9:22:33 PM) Brennan: fruits and such. things that you can eat raw and survive.
(9:22:42 PM) Markus: served on?
(9:22:49 PM) Brennan: by themselves
(9:22:49 PM) Markus: come on now
(9:22:51 PM) Markus: be civil
(9:22:57 PM) Brennan: they're washed
(9:23:08 PM) Markus: the floor could be dirty
(9:23:17 PM) Markus: my ass has been touching it
(9:23:22 PM) Markus: because I'm naked
(9:23:38 PM) Markus: I'm not going to kill myself with the plate
(9:23:40 PM) Markus: I promise
(9:23:40 PM) Brennan: utmost sanitary codes does this box stand by
(9:23:54 PM) Brennan: and no plate.
(9:24:06 PM) Markus: ok
(9:24:14 PM) Markus: I don't need a plate anyway
(9:24:16 PM) Markus: savage
(9:24:24 PM) Markus: what kind of fruits?
(9:24:41 PM) Brennan: stuff it knows not to serve you in case you're allergic
(9:24:45 PM) Markus: apples, oranges, avacados?
(9:25:07 PM) Markus: strawberries, melon?
(9:25:15 PM) Markus: not allergic to any fruit
(9:25:53 PM) Brennan: only when you are too weak to move from refusal to eat will food be served so that you could never be too strong to use it in a hurtful manner
(9:26:11 PM) Brennan: against yourself
(9:26:32 PM) Markus: ok, but what fruit do I get to eat, it may influence my decision based on aftertaste and flavor mixture
(9:26:50 PM) Brennan: neutral fruits
(9:26:58 PM) Markus: so avacado.......
(9:27:02 PM) Markus: *avocado
(9:27:11 PM) Markus: ................lame
(9:27:17 PM) Brennan: you love avocado
(9:27:22 PM) Markus: I do
(9:27:27 PM) Markus: but it is neutral
(9:27:30 PM) Markus: as you said
(9:27:37 PM) Markus: no way to mask flavors
(9:27:51 PM) Markus: are you sure I'm stuck with avocado?
(9:29:35 PM) Brennan: that may be one of the selection
(9:29:40 PM) Brennan: no way to say for sure
(9:29:49 PM) Brennan: until it happens
(9:29:54 PM) Markus: I hope not.
(9:30:02 PM) Markus: strawberries
(9:30:09 PM) Markus: now that would be great
(9:30:14 PM) Markus: but not neutral
(9:30:15 PM) Markus: lame
(9:31:13 PM) Brennan: Avocado's, also known as "the fertility fruit" by the Aztecs, may influence your decision.
(9:31:27 PM) Brennan: *Make you decide faster.
(9:31:36 PM) Markus: I'm okay with that
(9:31:43 PM) Markus: get it over with I say
(9:31:45 PM) Markus: speaking of
(9:31:54 PM) Brennan: have you come to a conclusion?
(9:31:57 PM) Markus: can this situation be prolonged indefinitely?
(9:32:01 PM) Markus: like
(9:32:14 PM) Brennan: till the end of time itself. this box will stand.
(9:32:15 PM) Markus: as long as I need time to think, I will have it?
(9:32:19 PM) Markus: wonderful
(9:32:43 PM) Markus: then I choke myself with my own long grown hair
(9:33:19 PM) Brennan: you are trimmed when you sleep and sleep you eventually must
(9:33:29 PM) Markus: not so sir
(9:33:31 PM) Markus: one moment
(9:34:41 PM) Brennan: A tiny, non-lethal neurotoxin that inhibits hair growth is released into the air on a steady enough basis to keep your locks at bay.
(9:35:05 PM) Markus: awesome
(9:35:07 PM) Brennan: smart box
(9:35:11 PM) Markus: I'm happy with that
(9:36:58 PM) Markus: neurotoxin will eventually build up in my system enough to paralyze me and make answering the question impossible.
(9:37:06 PM) Markus: even if I live
(9:37:20 PM) Brennan: did you not read the "non-lethal" bit of what I just said.
(9:37:27 PM) Markus: I did
(9:37:32 PM) Brennan: it implies something
(9:37:39 PM) Markus: non-lethal does not mean non-paralyzing
(9:37:50 PM) Brennan: touche
(9:38:57 PM) Markus: and paralyzing, or killing nerves, is something neurotoxin does by definition
(9:38:57 PM) Markus: so
(9:38:57 PM) Markus: there we have it
(9:38:57 PM) Markus: I went to a Rose Parade party tonight
(9:39:23 PM) Brennan: the fruit also contain vitamins or sorts to counter the paralyzing effects of the neurotoxin, i.e. it combats the build up, and to keep you healthy.
(9:39:32 PM) Markus: good
(9:39:48 PM) Brennan: so make a decision, Rose parade partyer
**Markus disconnects from the internet
(9:42:09 PM) Brennan: cheater

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Author's Notes:

• Don't ask.
• This conversation outweighed its former contender for the spot.
• Markus later admitted to wanting both as each sounded scrumptious.
• (That last point was a lie.)